Monday, January 30, 2006

More Movies...

I saw Under the Tuscan Sun yesterday. It came recommended... And I can imagine why women would like it so much. The idea that no man is indispensible in the life of a woman must have its charms. Love is fungible. Frankly, I was not too impressed by the plot/ storyline/ characters etc- except for the fact that it happened to someone in real life. Of course, the cinmatography is so cool. Lovely Italian countryside- I had forgotten how beautiful it was. Just wondering- do women handle divorce/ infidelity better than men?

I had a movie heavy weekend. Most of my regular drinking buddies were out of town, so I just clung to various groups of people who were around. Saw Narnia, Rang De Basanti, and then Tuscan late last night.

I thought Rang De was really good. And not just for the reasons that people seem to like it for. Of course, the first half is really really cool. It brings back beautiful memories of Delhi - especially since it is mostly shot right next to my school of 12 years . The production quality is awesome, locations brilliant, the switches from the sepia to colour I think are smartly handled, the use of foreshadowing is also quite cool- albeit a bit overdone. The end was desparately concocted, but I frankly don't see any other manner which could have satisfied the audience. And then of course, at the end I left the hall thinking What the hell I am doing with my life... And that's something I haven't felt in a long time after a movie (may be Hazaaron...).

Narnia was ok. It felt like watching LOTR which came in a white box reading for under 11 year olds. I think I need to do NZ sooner rather than later. Saw it with a friend whose been there once and wants to go again.

Monday, January 23, 2006

Movie Recommendation of the Week

Saw Closer. Strongly recommend it. A bold and different perspective on relationships. A sensitive treatment to love and sex- and the singularity of the two. Of course, you have to be in a certain frame of mind to decipher it. And don't miss the track which plays while the credits roll-

Artist: Damien Rice and Lisa Hannigan Lyrics
Song: The Blower's Daughter Lyrics

And so it is
Just like you said it would be
Life goes easy on me
Most of the time
And so it is
The shorter story
No love, no glory
No hero in her sky

I can't take my eyes off of you
I can't take my eyes off you
I can't take my eyes off of you
I can't take my eyes off you
I can't take my eyes off you
I can't take my eyes...

And so it is
Just like you said it should be
We'll both forget the breeze
Most of the time
And so it is
The colder water
The blower's daughter
The pupil in denial

I can't take my eyes off of you
I can't take my eyes off you
I can't take my eyes off of you
I can't take my eyes off you
I can't take my eyes off you
I can't take my eyes...

Did I say that I loathe you?
Did I say that I want to
Leave it all behind?

I can't take my mind off of you
I can't take my mind off you
I can't take my mind off of you
I can't take my mind off you
I can't take my mind off you
I can't take my mind...
My mind...my mind...
'Til I find somebody new

Saturday, January 14, 2006

Message in a Bottle

Don’t smoke.

If I had to offer one piece of advice of any consequence or reliability to the young, it would be don’t smoke. Or smoke, but do it with the knowledge that chances are that you will be doing it for a long, long time to come. A cigarette is not an easy companion to get rid of, and many have kicked the bucket before kicking the habit. And yes, it is not about mental fiber.

Find new ways to feel good about yourself. Take up a hobby, join acting classes, read Dilbert. Do the daily Crossword- whatever. As you grow older you’ll realize that it is increasingly difficult to hit a high with the old tricks. Buy presents for yourself.

At work and life otherwise, remember that it is important to snatch small wins. Big deals will happen, but don’t ignore the small ones. At the end of the year you will realize that in summary, the small things that have made you happy, stack-up quite nicely.

It is perfectly ok if you don’t plan in advance. It is even ok not to know your next move most of the time. But try not to procrastinate. Of all the characteristics of the human race, procrastination is the most innocuous evil.

Dream. Dream of a house, a family, of owning all the music you could ever want. Dream of driving along the Old Silk Route. But do something about at least some of your dreams while you still can. The worst thing you can do to yourself is to have all these dreams, and rush through life, end up at 70, with all the time in the world and no wherewithal to do anything about it.

Do well at work, or do whatever you need to, to have the money. Money is important. It is the sixth sense without which the other five are incomplete. Without money no one is ever going to be around you for long enough. They might like you, even love, but at the end of the day, there has to be bread on the kitchen shelves and milk in the fridge.

Don't hesitate to change professions to make sure that you continue doing what you like. But never ever settle for a pay cut.

Dress well. It is especially important to dress well if you do not possess the looks. A good suit can open doors. A smart tie can get you a date.

Write. Even if no one is reading, write. Write your thoughts, your dreams. Write about the girl next door, the crack in your bedroom wall. Write whatever you feel like, but write. And after you’ve written, keep a copy. At leisure, read what you wrote six months back.

Find ways to be at peace with yourself, by yourself. It is the best thing you can gift yourself. Sooner or later, your friends will get married, have kids, and may be so will you. But unless you’re comfortable being with yourself, no one else is going to be happy being around you. Be your own inspiration.

Give marriage a chance, or at least long-term companionship. Like speech, commitment is a gift given only to human kind.

Respect age, respect experience. The most efficient model to success is to learn from others’ experiences. Be around people with experience. Keep good company.

Don’t resist change. Don’t resist temptation either. People bring experiences- don’t shy away from them. Don’t be afraid of making new friends, even if they’re not of your age. And yes, have a special place for friends from the opposite sex- they lend you a perspective that not any number of people of your own sex can ever substitute. Whatever you do, try and be nice to people.

Enjoy your vices for the occasions that caused you into them, and not for the vice itself. For instance, drinking with clients is business, drinking with friends is fun. Drinking alone is a disaster.

Procreate if you must, but do it before you’re 32. This will ensure that before you’re into your fifties, your kids will be out of their teens and are packed off to university. Remember, kids are a negative carry trade. Life is all downhill after you have one. If you don’t want them, always use protection. It has other benefits, but avoiding accidental conception is the most vital one. Be responsible in this respect.

Don’t be afraid of saying the three magic words. Most people like the sound of it. If it works, you’re in a for a cracker, if it doesn’t, its just some wasted breath. Relish and respect the precious few connections.

Hold on to people you love, but don’t be clingy. People like being loved, so do you. People hate being cornered in a relationship, and so do you. Learn to forgive in a relationship, but learn not to forget. When you’re 23 you think you’ll always meet people you’ll connect with. But when you’re 32, you’ll find it is not so.

While everything in this world happens for a reason, try not to find one every time. Realize that some reasons are best left to themselves: enjoy the moment. Live for it.

At the end of it all, don’t smoke.

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I think I am going through a Mary Schmich phase. Wonder why- I can’t even pronounce her last name. So I decided to try out some of the things she suggests that every one should try doing. Consider this:

“Inside every adult lurks a graduation speaker dying to get out, some world-weary pundit eager to pontificate on life to young people who'd rather be Rollerblading. Most of us, alas, will never be invited to sow our words of wisdom among an audience of caps and gowns, but there's no reason we can't entertain ourselves by composing a Guide to Life for Graduates.

I encourage anyone over 26 to try this and thank you for indulging my attempt.”

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Ah yes, I smoke.

Thursday, January 12, 2006

Thanks Mary Schmich!

After the Sunscreen episode I have begun reading more of Mary Schmich. Her page in The Chicago Tribune is a good place to hang out for her writings. There are articles with interesting titles such as "Everything that comes in pairs is destined to become single"- a story on the cold weather in Chicago and her ordeal with gloves. Apart from her regular columns over the years, the page also has a collection of her stories- I don't know why is it that they are called stories in any case, because they don't really tell a tale. I liked most of what she has to write, but this one story I read recently has caught my fancy, and has made me think on busy as hell Thursday.
The story is titled- Vivid memories light way home for Christmas ghosts. The basic theme is summed up in the following paragraph-
"The spirits of the absent guests always remind me that Christmas is never just one Christmas. It is the sum of all the Christmases you've known and all the people who have inhabited them.
Perhaps more than any other day, Christmas is the measure of passing time, the collective clock by which we count out our lives. It's a mutating event anchored in unchanging rituals. New characters join any family's cast--new spouses, babies, lovers--but the old cast is still clattering around in the wings."
On reading this story, I felt strangely nostalgic, about that one annual ritual that we Bengalis, even those in exile , celebrate quite fervently. It is called Durga Puja- and for us it the most prominent festival of the year.
I have very vivid recollections of Puja- spent with family, friends, neighbours, and other close ones. Puja has very different memories for me, at various ages.
At the age of 5, holding my dad's hand, and being taken from one festival ground to the other, sometimes in awe, some times in fear, being scolded at for various offences, mostly lack of attention and obedience. The euphoria then was with the new clothes, of not having to go to school. The fear, was in the crowds.
At the age of 12, when I was first handed over responsibilities, at the local festival ground to distribute fruits for each of the three days. New clothes became less important- the new found recognition was more than enough. There were women to impress, but not with appearances- 12 year olds can rarely impress girls of their age with their looks- such is the rule of nature. The euphoria was in the responsibility, the fear was of anonymity.
At 15, responsibilities multiplied, and so did the hormone levels. A wild stubble dominated my face, and of those around me. All the guys I knew were ugly, all the girls enormously pretty. I remember doing the first stage appearance, bringing the goddess home, and then taking it away for immersion. The joy was in the completion of a job well-done, the fear was a failure in front of the girls.
At 17, the joy was at finding a Puja close to your engineering college hostel, the fear was of not being at home for it, and knowing probably for ever. Maa calling, in tears, to say that this is your first Puja away from home.
At 29, the joy is finding the rare few Bengalis to round up to do the rounds of festival grounds in Bombay, the fear, is of knowing that your worst fears at 19 were probably true. Maa calling to say that that ... that yes, it is your 12th one away straight, and not bothering to shed tears.

Monday, January 02, 2006

The Sunscreen Song

The Sun Screen Song
One of my favorite songs, is commonly referred to as "The Sunscreen Song". It is what sounds like a commencement speech, set to music. In fact it is not a real commencement speech (though it should be!), but rather a column that appeared in the Chicago Tribune on June 1, 1997 entitled "ADVICE, LIKE YOUTH, PROBABLY JUST WASTED ON THE YOUNG" by staff writer Mary Schmich.

Sometime around Thursday, July 31, 1997, Mary's article found it's way onto the internet in the form of an email hoax, claiming to be the 1997 commencement address of Kurt Vonnegut to MIT grads. The real address that year was actually delivered by U.N. Secretary General Kofi Annan on June 5. You can find it posted on MIT's website.

A year later, the email re-circulated claiming to be Kurt's commencement address to the Class of 1998!

The email caught the attention of Australian film director Baz Luhrmann, who is best known for two films — "Strictly Ballroom," about competitive dancing, and a 1996 remake of "Romeo and Juliet," starring Leonardo DiCaprio and Claire Danes.

Luhrmann eventually tracked the source of the speech to Schmich, and contacted Chicago Tribune management to buy the rights to the words to turn it into a song. He took Quindon Tarver's "Everybody's Free (to Feel Good)" song, remixed it, and hired Sydney actor Lee Perry to read Schmich's "speech". The end result became the seven-minute long "Sunscreen Song".

The song received heavy airplay from American radio stations nationwide after KNRK in Portland aired an edited (about 4 1/2 minute) version in the spring of 1999 -- about the time of graduation that year. According to Luhrmann's label, Capitol Records, it became the most requested song on radio morning shows in Atlanta and Philadelphia

Happy 2006!!!

Car radio is a wonderful thing- discovered this yesterday while driving on the Pune Expressway, returning from the PARTY! So it becomes, the theme for 2006.
The lyrics to Everybody's Free to Wear Sunscreen, by Mary Schmich:

Wear sunscreen.
If I could offer you only one tip for the future, sunscreen would be it. The long-term benefits of sunscreen have been proved by scientists, whereas the rest of my advice has no basis more reliable than my own meandering experience. I will dispense this advice now.

Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth. Oh, never mind. You will not understand the power and beauty of your youth until they've faded. But trust me, in 20 years, you'll look back at photos of yourself and recall in a way you can't grasp now how much possibility lay before you and how fabulous you really looked. You are not as fat as you imagine.

Don't worry about the future. Or worry, but know that worrying is as effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubble gum. The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that never crossed your worried mind, the kind that blindside you at 4 p.m. on some idle Tuesday.

Do one thing every day that scares you.

Sing.

Don't be reckless with other people's hearts. Don't put up with people who are reckless with yours.

Floss.

Don't waste your time on jealousy. Sometimes you're ahead, sometimes you're behind. The race is long and, in the end, it's only with yourself.

Remember compliments you receive. Forget the insults. If you succeed in doing this, tell me how.

Keep your old love letters. Throw away your old bank statements.

Stretch.

Don't feel guilty if you don't know what you want to do with your life. The most interesting people I know didn't know at 22 what they wanted to do with their lives. Some of the most interesting 40-year-olds I know still don't.

Get plenty of calcium. Be kind to your knees. You'll miss them when they're gone.

Maybe you'll marry, maybe you won't. Maybe you'll have children, maybe you won't. Maybe you'll divorce at 40, maybe you'll dance the funky chicken on your 75th wedding anniversary. Whatever you do, don't congratulate yourself too much, or berate yourself either. Your choices are half chance. So are everybody else's.

Enjoy your body. Use it every way you can. Don't be afraid of it or of what other people think of it. It's the greatest instrument you'll ever own.

Dance, even if you have nowhere to do it but your living room.

Read the directions, even if you don't follow them.

Do not read beauty magazines. They will only make you feel ugly.

Get to know your parents. You never know when they'll be gone for good. Be nice to your siblings. They're your best link to your past and the people most likely to stick with you in the future.

Understand that friends come and go, but with a precious few you should hold on. Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography and lifestyle, because the older you get, the more you need the people who knew you when you were young.

Live in New York City once, but leave before it makes you hard. Live in Northern California once, but leave before it makes you soft.

Travel.

Accept certain inalienable truths: Prices will rise. Politicians will philander. You, too, will get old. And when you do, you'll fantasize that when you were young, prices were reasonable, politicians were noble and children respected their elders.

Respect your elders.

Don't expect anyone else to support you. Maybe you have a trust fund. Maybe you'll have a wealthy spouse. But you never know when either one might run out.

Don't mess too much with your hair for by the time you're 40 it will look 85.

Be careful whose advice you buy, but be patient with those who supply it. Advice is a form of nostalgia. Dispensing it is a way of fishing the past from the disposal, wiping it off, painting over the ugly parts and recycling it for more than it's worth.

But trust me on the sunscreen.